Before you all yell at me to not call myself fat--well, here's the facts: I am. I am far too heavy for my height, age and overall health. Forty-five percent of my body weight is fat. This is not good.
But I'm taking the reins and I'm going to do something about it. Depression and anxiety be damned--no more driving by the gym every day on my way home from work and moaning to myself, "I'm too tired, I'm too hungry, I'm too...whatever." No excuses! One of the big reasons I picked the apartment complex I live in is because it is about three blocks from a 24 Hour Fitness.
As you might know, I signed up for ten sessions with a personal trainer. He is what 24 Hour calls a Master Trainer--he knows his stuff. I hope he kicks me in the butt, because I need it. We had our first appointment today, and he gave me homework: I need to keep a food journal, and I need to do 35 minutes of cardio once this weekend, and on Monday or Tuesday (our next appointment is Wednesday).
Today, we did the hard part. No, not endless stomach crunches, or lunges with me hauling dumbbells in my hands. That's the EASY part. The hard part was letting a fitness god weigh me and measure my body fat. I wanted to sink through the floor.
But again, NO SINKING! Nope, this ship is unsinkable (it should be--fat floats). I will soldier on, and knowing that I have appointments with this guy for at least the next five weeks (I might buy more, if I feel I need it), and that his "homework assignments" he is giving me are part of the plan to help me take control of my weight, my eating habits, my exercise habits--hell, my LIFE--is making it easier to put down the Dr. Pepper and strap on my gym shoes.
Tomorrow I will walk to the gym--no driving unless its dark out, or I'm coming straight from work, 10 miles away--and do my 35 minutes of cardio. Maybe I'll do some stretches and crunches while I'm there. Sunday is all about NASCAR, but I might just try to get some gym time in then, too. I don't want to overdo it, but I figure if I feel like working out, I should. At the very least, I could swim some laps on Sunday, in the heated pool.
By my trainer's calculations, I can conceivably be at my goal weight by January 4, 2010. In the meantime, every bit of weight loss, every clothing size dropped, is an achievement. Every time I put down the Dr. Pepper and pick up water, or eat an apple instead of chocolate is a victory. I will take the stairs, and not park in the very front of the parking lot, choosing instead to walk. Soon, I will be posting blog entries under the title, "Diary of a Girl With a Cute Figure." Lane Bryant will be a thing of my past.
And never again will I stand on a scale, embarassed and ashamed.
7 comments:
You GO, girl. I'm so proud of you for having the motivation and the positive attitude to take initiative and take control of your own life.
And also: "fat" is not a dirty word. It's okay to be fat, and it's okay to call someone fat. We all need to learn that "fat" is not an evil word.
Thank you for that. I know, for me, that being fat is not a good thing. I am not healthy, and I know a healthier Meg is in there somewhere. I'm going to work on finding her!
Oh, and you reminded me of a cute story. In my first year of teaching, I was singing "Six Little Ducks" with some kindergartners. We were discussing how there are "fat ones, skinny ones, short ones, too." A little guy stood up, pointed at me, and yelled, "You're the FAT duck!!"
It took everything I had not to laugh hysterically. It was, by far, the funniest thing a kid has ever said to me (because I know, to a five-year-old, "fat" is not an insult).
I agree with Britni: "fat" is not a dirty word. Beauty ideals change all the time and differ with cultures too. It's the inside that counts, and that doesn't change. Our bodies eventually all head "south" anyway (if you get my drift), whether we're fat or not.
I think getting healthy is the right goal, without getting attached to a certain number, though. (You do know that muscle weighs more than fat, don't you?)
Anway: rah-rah-rah (sorry, I don't know how to spell that) and all that!!! Here's to the soon-to-be Incredible Healthy Meg!!
Too bad you don't live close. I need half your motivation.
Fat should not be a word associated with laziness and other unflattering attributes. =) I'm glad you're taking control of something that obviously bothered before, and that really motivates me to do the same!
Kudos, Meg!
It sounds like you've got the right attitude and perspective. Keep in mind my favorite quote about getting fit; it's from Jack Dixon, trainer and weight management expert...
"If you focus on results, you will never change. If you focus on change, you will get results."
Good luck to you!
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