Sunday, November 25, 2012

Skinny Bitch

I came across this cartoon on Facebook a few days ago. It was early in the day--I was still a bit groggy, perhaps, and my tea hadn't yet cooled enough for me to send a little caffeine jolt through my system. Maybe I was a little too defensive, but my hackles immediately went up.






There's this incredibly irresponsible stereotype that exists that if you're skinny enough to wear the teensy-weensy clothes at the store, you must be starving yourself, right? You must be a miserable, unhappy skinny bitch who hasn't had more than one nibble of chocolate in three years.

Cut it out, society! Seriously!

I used to wish I could fit in those cute, tiny fashions, and moaned that the clothes made for girls my size were "tents." I know how it feels to walk around a store wishing I could wear the clothes on the racks but knowing they wouldn't fit. And I know how it is to come out on the other side, wearing size small clothing, and I love the feeling of walking into a store and knowing that most of the clothes there will look good on me now. Of course there are certain styles I stay away from (long dresses make me look even shorter, for example), but these days, instead of long, agonizing hours in the fitting room looking for just one outfit that will work, puh-lease, Universe, I can eyeball things on the rack and know whether it will fit my shape and size.

And guess what?

I eat.

I eat a lot.

I eat eggs for breakfast, scrambled (yolks and all!) with beans and veggies, topped with goat cheese. I eat sandwiches on real bread and I eat lots of fruit (all summer it was endless strawberries and now I've moved on to mandarins), sugars and all. I eat a little chocolate here and there. I eat a few pumpkin snickerdoodles that I'm helping Mom make for a cookie exchange.

I. Eat.

And yet, I fit into those eensy-weensy little dresses, too, because in addition to eating without going totally overboard in my portion sizes, I also burn calories. I worked my ass off--literally--to get here, and I continue to work to keep in shape. I run, I lift weights, I cycle, I swim, I do Burpees (believe me, they're no picnic) and I sweat like a pig the whole time.

I wake up with sore muscles, and run when my muscles are being angsty. I relish the small discomforts of working out as hard as I do because the results are worth it. And--I'll just say it one more time--I eat.

Good food. Healthy, hearty, whole food. Sure, I avoid processed foods as much as possible, and look for ways to make favorite recipes a little bit healthier. But I certainly don't feel deprived, and I get a little bit pissy at cartoons like the one above that imply that it's just sooo easy to fit into a tiny dress by...*giggle* you're gonna love this punchline!...not eating.

Because it's not true, and it's so much harder than that. These cartoons only serve to promote an us-versus-them mentality when women look at their dress size and then try to guess the dress size of the woman next to them. It belittles the very real and very difficult journey I went on to yes, shrink my body size but more importantly, to make myself healthier.

So next time you see me, running around in my size 2 jeans or a dress from the juniors department, don't make the assumption that I'm starving myself to maintain this body. Nothing could be further from the truth.

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