Running Solo

When I started running, it was definitely a solitary activity. Plug the ole ear buds in, crank up the volume on the iPod, and set off alone to do my thing. It worked for me--and still works for me, actually. Running with others creates a situation where compromise is required. Someone is always going to have to speed up a little, or slow down a little. It's rare that two runners are exactly the same pace and able to stay together for a whole run.

But every once in a while, it is nice--and in my run club, I've had some great runs with another lady who runs at about the same pace as me. I joined the club because I wanted to improve as a runner, and figured that running with others would be a good way to motivate myself, to push my speed, and to get tips about how to be a better runner.

Unfortunately, it mostly hasn't been the case. While I've pushed up my mileage a little, it's only when this other lady is there, and unfortunately, her work schedule doesn't permit her to be there every week. So often, I find myself alone, as the faster runners sprint around the track and our de facto "coach" times them, shouts encouragement at them, and leaves me to "get more mileage." When I've asked for advice on form, I get vague answers, but he's never really watched me run or given me any feedback on my foot strike, or body position.

And in the last few weeks, I've noticed more and more that when numbers are light (the nasty weather, the holidays, etc.) I find myself driving over 15 miles to meet my running club, only to find that I've driven all that way to run circles around a track by myself, with very little interaction with the others because I'm simply not doing anything that is monumental to them. They routinely run several miles at a much faster pace than I'm capable of. My recent 31:37 best time in a 5K race is nothing to them--a quick smile and a patronizing pat on the head.

To me, it's a really big deal.

To be fair, there are a few people there who get it, who understand that every tiny accomplishment I reach is huge to me because I started at 220 pounds, as someone who could not run. And it's not that I need a standing ovation from the group just because I laced up my running shoes and showed up at a workout. I guess what I want is for the people who supposedly "run" the group, who act as coaches and board members, to show a little more interest in helping all runners improve, and not just for races, but for every day health and wellness. The Facebook page celebrates club members who recently ran the California International Marathon, but I can't even get a coach to run with me.

So I'm thinking it's time to move on--why pay $25 in dues when I end up spending far more in gas money just getting there each week? Why get up before dawn on Saturday to drive all the way down there and run by myself, when I could sleep a little later and run by myself here at home? I had hoped that doing something different would improve my running, but to be honest, running circles on a track is pretty boring...and the gas money I'll save getting there can go towards buying more running shoes.

Now, too, I've taken on a new venture in which I'll probably be teaching some private music lessons on Saturday mornings, making it impossible to get to the group workout anyway. Other club workouts are geared towards trails, keeping a faster group together.

So I'm back where I started--running my neighborhood by myself. I actually don't really mind--I have a small waist pouch I can keep my iPod in, and a fantastic playlist of songs that urge me forward. The neighborhood is hilly, so I have variation and challenges. Today, I tried a slightly new route for part of my run, and found I enjoyed finding a new place to add some mileage. The bottom line is, the more I run, the better I get at it.

Still, I'm disappointed to leave the run club behind a little--there are some very lovely people, and I cannot blame anyone there for my disappointment. Maybe I'll catch a workout now and again, as a non-member. And then again, maybe I'll be too busy pounding the pavement, pursuing that sub-30 5K I've set my sights on.