Monday, February 27, 2012

Vent Ahead

I am tired tonight. I am so very tired, and emotional. And I'm sitting here thinking I made a huge mistake signing on to this Aflac stuff, because here are some key truths:
  1. Insurance is boring.
  2. I made it through half of the first chapter in my course today, my first day (I'm supposed to be finished with two whole chapters by now), and I do not understand any of what I read. I can't even regurgitate answers like a trained monkey.
  3. The thought of trying to make a living by talking to people on the phone trying to sell them on providing Aflac for their employees makes me want to cry.
  4. I hate the phone.
  5. I'd honest-to-God rather work as a retail drone at Target.
  6. If I'm completely honest with myself, I only signed up for this because I don't want my parents worrying about me. 
  7. So now I'm miserable and making them miserable with my misery.
Regrets? You have no idea.

My parents are cheering me on, saying things like, "You can learn this!" and "You'll be great! You have great people skills!" and I am just sitting here struggling not to cry. Day one of trying to learn about insurance and I am miserable.

But I'm also desperate. Because my parents are also constantly reminding me that I won't get a teaching job this year (thanks for the vote of confidence!). I am still applying like crazy because right now, if I can land a teaching job--any teaching job--I will gladly take it over selling insurance.

Even substitute teaching.

Anyway, I think I've made a huge mistake. But I'm going to finish the training the best I can (including the Aflac one I have to be at in Folsom in...yikes, 9 hours) and hope I don't embarrass myself on the state test. But honestly? I'm writing down the chapter word for word and still not understanding or retaining any of it.

Case in point:

The Law of Large Numbers: The larger the number of exposures considered, the more closely the losses reported will equal the probability of loss.

What the hell are exposures? I hadn't even encountered that word yet in my reading. And read that sentence. Even Dad had to pick it apart for a few minutes before he could explain it to me. And this is just one teensy law in half of a chapter about the "basics" of insurance. I feel like I've just been handed a paper grocery bag with a blanket, a couple bottles of water and some tins of Spam and told to climb Everest.

Desperate.

2 comments:

Nefarious Newt said...

I wish I'd come across the post sooner. You can think of exposures as the actual policies written; all the Law of Large Numbers says is that, over time, the number of policies paid out on will resemble the number they calculated they would have to pay out.

In simpler terms, they'll have to pay out on as many policies as they thought they would have to.

Confusing, no?

I feel your pain. I tries to sell insurance once, when I was desperate for a job. I was no good at it. I hated cold-calling people. I hated trying to sell things. To me, life insurance was a no-brainer; who wouldn't want to buy it?

Needless to say, I wasn't very good at it.

If you quit, don't feel bad. Something tells me you'd be better off with another kind of job, any other kind of job. Don't get discouraged.

Anonymous said...

Yeah, I can't help but echo what Newt said: I also think you'd be better off with any other kind of job than selling insurance.

PurpleMagpie