Today had to be the worst run I've ever done.
My running successes come in waves. I'll go through a period of great running, where I don't exactly love doing it but I do it and it's fine and relatively painless. Go me! I always feel great afterwards. Not great enough to do it again, but satisfied and healthy and like I've accomplished something. Then life gets in the way and I take a couple days off and that next run is hard and maybe I let my brain talk me into quitting too soon...
Almost exactly one month ago, I was cleaning the whole house in anticipation of Mom and Dad's return from their three-week cruise. I hadn't trashed the place, but I wanted it to be fresh and welcoming for them when they got home. In the midst of cleaning, suddenly, my back was hurting. Really hurting. I hobbled into my bedroom and sat down, thinking, "Oh, God, just what I don't need." I noticed, that day and the next, that I was at my most uncomfortable when I sat for long periods of time, and walking around the house seemed to help it. Still, I wanted to be cautious, so I stopped all working out for a few days...which turned into a week.
The next week, I felt a cold coming on. A little tickle in the throat. Nose plugged up. I was nearing my first concert with SCSO, so I stopped all activity and spent that week resting so as not to get sick. It worked...but now I'd had two weeks without a good workout.
I have all these excuses, and really, it all just amounts to me being lazy.
I started getting back to working out, trying to get to the gym more, trying to run. But running, after two weeks off, was a disaster. I was not pushing myself, and occasionally, my back would twinge enough to make me turn around and walk home. My biggest fear is hurting myself to a point where I can't work out, and gaining the weight back.
So I signed up to work with M. I'm glad I did, as it is giving me the motivation I need, but damn, my body is really hurting today.
Before I hurt my back a month ago, I was running pretty well--not as long as I should, but I was getting closer and closer to a ten-minute mile and feeling pretty good. Now, my last few runs have been completely miserable.
Over the last few years, I've gotten in the habit of doing my cardio before an appointment with a trainer, simply because I'm often wiped out after working with someone who has more muscles in his left calf than I have in my whole body. M., however, wants me to do my cardio after my appointments with him.
Monday's appointment was great. I worked up a sweat, the exercises were doable but still worked my body, and M. and I are establishing a great rapport already. (I told him my theory about him getting Nice Confident Megan, while Gershom was stuck, two years ago, with Bratty I-Can't-Do-This Megan. He laughed and said, "I have a lot to thank him for--you have great form and are easy to work with because you know what you can do.") When I left, I felt good. I was slurping down my smoothie (this is a new, twice-a-day, trainer-mandated addition to my diet) and assuring him that though I was tired, I'd run 30 minutes that afternoon and again today.
Yesterday's run was hard. I had a hard time running for five minutes, let alone thirty. So I pushed myself for 5 minute intervals, walking between. Not great, but it was the best I could muster. Today, I couldn't even do that.
I can run for 15-20 minutes, usually, before the major fatigue starts setting in. Getting to two minutes and wanting to collapse is not a good feeling. I can't describe how painful today's run was--my legs didn't want to move forward. My arms didn't want to propel me along. My back and hips were all over the place--I could feel my hips swaying as I ran--not good. When I got home, I was gasping, and it took a lot longer for me to recover than usual. I could barely muster the energy to make my smoothie.
But like I mentioned above--my running success comes in waves. I'm making up for lost time, I'm back to training for the first time in a year-and-a-half, and I have to be patient. Today sucked, but tomorrow could very well be a great running day.
I doubt it can be worse than today, anyway.
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