Is there anything more hysterically awkward than a middle school dance?
I doubt it.
Monday night found me hanging out with my colleagues and several 7th and 8th graders in the school cafeteria, chaperoning the school dance.
At 5:00, the kids started to arrive, dolled up and ready to impress the opposite sex. The boys immediately sat down. The girls clustered in the middle of the dance floor in a tight knot, giggling and gossiping. The DJ started playing hip hop tunes, and bodies started bopping self-consciously.
Finally, Soulja Boy came on, the all the kids hopped up to do the crazy "Superman that Ho" dance (I know, I know...). Then a fun dance tune came on that gave instructions like "slide to the left" and "shuffle on back." The kids and teachers were all astounded when Mr. W., our most strict and buttoned-up teacher (but a really nice guy), got out on the dance floor.
I helped the principal sell pizza, Skittles and water, and laughed at how cute the kids were--only leaving to stand at the door for a bit (cooler air) and to dance the YMCA.
The best moment of the night was watching the last slow song of the evening. One couple consisted of a girl who was taller than her partner. His eyes were level with...her bosoms. Their stiff-armed dancing was made so much cuter by his turned head, as he steadfastly refused to look straight into her chest.
My colleagues and I laughed silently, remembering in our own minds our own experiences with middle school dances...all those years ago. Would any of us go back to that time in our lives?
Oh, hell no!