So Much For That Resolution...

But hey, it's only March--I can still get better about updating the LPB, right? It's been a crazy few weeks, and I think I can be excused for not wanting to update.

Some news and headlines from my world...as ever, Wild and Absolutely True.

How To Save A Life

Where did I go wrong, I lost a friend
Somewhere along in the bitterness
And I would have stayed up with you all night
Had I known how to save a life
--From "How To Save a Life" by The Fray

I'm pleased to report that I am now officially certified to perform CPR. I woke up at some ungodly hour (been doing that a lot this week--more on that in a minute) and drove myself 40 miles to Richmond, a rather desperate place with fabulous views of San Francisco. I took a free three-hour course through the American Red Cross, spending my Saturday morning giving life-saving breaths and chest compressions to a mannequin.

I had to take the course as part of a long course to clearing my teaching credential, but it's also something I've been wanting to do for some time. I finally got around to it. I'm hardly a CPR expert, but I did learn a little bit more about helping out in emergency situations...which is good, because...

Emergencies Happen

I don't want to go into all of the details in such a public forum, but suffice it to say that Monday found me spending my prep period helping campus security flag down the ambulance because a student overdosed on Advil and prescription medicines. She used to be in one of my choirs but dropped at the semester to get a couple of credits she needs to graduate. She fainted outside my room at the beginning of 5th period and another teacher and the student's boyfriend carried her into my room to get her out of the rain and cold.

I called security and helped them with phone calls and whatnot while they took care of her. The police arrived first, and I ran outside to help another campus security person flag down the ambulance.

It was some scary stuff, but I'm glad to report that the student is fine now. Physically, anyway.

Under Pressure

Chippin' around - kick my brains around the floor
These are the days it never rains but it pours
--From "Under Pressure" by Queen

To say that the last month has been stressful is the understatement of the year. I can't really explain it. I've just been under enormous pressure to be the teacher I'm not; to live up to the expectations my students have after having the previous director for so long. It's not easy. And God, some of those kids can be brats. Then there's planning a three-day trip to Anaheim, which nearly killed me before some wonderful parents took that job over.

My last blog update told of my recent minor car accident, and getting sick over my parents' anniversary weekend. It took a good couple of weeks to completely get past that bug. I went to the doctor to make sure it wasn't in my chest (it wasn't) and the doctor freaked out at my blood pressure. Turns out all that Dayquil and Nyquil will do that to a person...but nonetheless, the doc put me on a blood pressure medication. Great--let's add health stress to my growing list!

I went to Mom and Dad's again for my second of two three-day weekends, and had a lovely time just holing up in the house with them. Mom and I did a brief shopping run, but I was still pretty tired from being sick. Mostly we just watched TV, read books, worked on puzzles. I cuddled with Millie, Bella and Duchess, and sat around in my pajamas a lot.

Monday rolled around and it was time for me to return to Antioch. I loaded up my car and then promptly burst into tears. The big, messy, gooey kind. Sobbing, heaving tears. Mom took me back into the house and I spent two hours bawling and unloading all of my stress and worries on her. I just couldn't calm down. Finally I was okay to drive and got on the road with my faithful sidekick in her cat carrier.

Again, I can't really explain all of the things that I've been trying to cope with--it's so much more than typical job stress and that bug I had. It includes loneliness and a feeling of isolation I sometimes have, living where I live. I have friends, and I know if I ever needed anything, all I have to do is call Karen or Larry from school and they would be there to help me in no time flat. But still, I spend a lot of time alone when I'm not at work, and the sad fact is that my dearest friends are too far away, and we are all too busy these days to see each other much.

And add to it all that a few weeks ago we had THREE shootings within TWO miles of my apartment in ONE weekend...

So I've spent a few evenings sobbing in my apartment, partly over job stuff, partly because of loneliness, partly because I just didn't feel in control of anything. The good news is that I had a physical recently, and the doctor had some help and advice for that. She called it "situational anxiety," and she thinks it will be something I'm able to move past given time. In the meantime, she suggested I talk to a counselor, just to get it all out and sort through it all. So I'll be doing that.

The even better news is that every time I've had my blood pressure read since the day it was high, it has been normal.

Got Sleep?

Normally, if I'm going to have problems with insomnia, it's not being able to fall asleep. This last week, however, I've been waking up at all wee hours of the morning, and then tossing and turning until finally giving up the good fight at 5-something and getting up. I've spent many days this week yawning in my students' faces and contemplating putting my head down on the baby grand in my classroom for a quick nap.

It started Tuesday morning, when I woke up at 4:00 and did not get back to sleep again. On Wednesday I woke up at 1:40 and tossed and turned, only dozing lightly a couple of times between then and 5:30. On Thursday morning I woke up very briefly at 1:40, then fell asleep until 4:00. By Friday morning I was unaware of what time I was waking up--actually, I just didn't bother looking, but I know by 4:00 I was awake with no hope of sleeping again.

I even woke up in the wee hours this morning. It's freakin' Saturday!

Needless to say, I've been tired.

Life Is A Highway

Mom and Dad had mentioned briefly a few months ago that they should probably make a trip to Utah this spring to see my Grandma. While there, they'd probably pop up to Idaho to meet Tyson, my soon-to-be-official nephew. The adoption is set to be finalized in May, so everyone send positive vibes!

I want to meet Tyson myself, and see Grandma, so I asked Dad if he and Mom could plan their trip around my Spring Break. They had no problem with this, so we'll be driving to Salt Lake City for a few days in early April. I'm already compiling songs on my iTunes to make a couple of long mix CDs for the drive.

Driving through Nevada has to be the most boring activity I can think of (well, except for watching grass grow, maybe), and Salt Lake City isn't the most happening city on the planet, but it should still be a fun trip. It's always nice to see family, and it will be a change from California for a few days.

Plum Pick

Last summer Mom and I went to the Barnes and Noble near her home and saw that there was going to be a big author visiting the next day--Janet Evanovich. Mom asked one of the employees about her, and the employee told us about a series of books Janet wrote called the Stephanie Plum Mysteries. Mom bought the first one, One For The Money.

After reading it, she proceeded to buy and read, one by one, the next 11 books in the series, loving each and every one. "You have to read them," she would tell me. I would nod and smile, and file the idea away for a while. It's not that I didn't want to read them--they looked fun an all, but I was going through a big Regency phase at the time and couldn't buy enough Julia Quinn, Mary Balogh and Lisa Kleypas.

Anyway, during that second three-day weekend, I picked up One For The Money and started reading. And laughing my butt off. In the two weeks since then, I have gobbled up ten of the books. I've got Eleven On Top on my night table, which I'll start tonight, and Twelve Sharp waiting in the wings. Lean Mean Thirteen comes out in June, and to keep myself entertained while waiting for that, I've got two holiday-themed "between the numbers" books, Visions of Sugar Plums and Plum Lovin', to devour.

A little bit of background:

Stephanie Plum is a down-on-her luck Jersey girl who's been laid off from her job as lingerie buyer at a department store. Desperate for a job, she blackmails her sleazy cousin Vinnie into giving her a job as a bounty hunter for his bail bonds business. Her first assignment is to capture a cop-on-the-run, Joe Morelli, the irresistable bad-boy she lost her virginity to years ago.

Over the course of the series she teams up with her sexy bounty hunter mentor, Ranger; not-so-guilty cop Morelli; a plus-sized ex-hooker named Lula; Bob the Dog Who'll Eat Anything; her sassy Grandma Mazur; Sally Sweet, a transvestite-but-not-gay musician; and throught it all she has the non-support of her roommate, Rex the hamster.

No car is safe from Stephanie Plum's bad luck, with the exception of her uncle's horrid powder-blue '53 Buick. She is possibly the only bounty hunter on the planet who leaves her .38 in the cookie jar at home instead of taking it with her on a bust.

These books are hilarious.

And That's About It

It's 8:30 on a Saturday night, and this red-blooded American girl is going to...hop in bed with her Stephanie Plum book. Hey, I'm exhausted. Things are looking up in my life, but I'm still more tired than I can begin to describe.

Cheers,

Meg